To continue on with my blogging challenge, I'd like to write about the art wall I'm building in my room.
I began wanting to decorate my room an unspecified amount of time ago. I'm not being vague intentionally. Time hasn't really functioned properly during the pandemic, and even though the lockdown has been eased in my country, I still struggling to distinguish between days.
I've struggled to feel grounded by anything for a long time. Every year since I left my family home for uni, I've lived in a different place. It was uni halls twice, a student house for a year and then the house I'm living in now. Nowhere has felt like home.
Because of this, it felt kind of pointless to decorate. I had fantasies of fairy lights and posters. Plants and carpets. Just anything that would make a space mine. But what was the use? I would have to move all of that stuff out anyway. Arranging a room is very personal and there was no point in doing that if I wouldn't be in that room in a couple of months.
With the house I'm in, I just got bored. I don't have much space so the dream of a reading chair, a window seat and a desk are out the window. I just got antsy and needed something that made me feel like I wasn't just living in my friend's spare room. So I decided to decorate.
I've been collecting postcards from art museums and charity shops, which I planned on placing on my wall. I have attempted this in the past which hasn't always turned out the best. I always felt it was too uniform. This time I decided to make a collage. I ripped up these old calendars I had in my room and placed them in an odd square on the wall opposite my bed. From there, I arranged the postcards on my wall by colour.
Having control over something in my life is very empowering even if it is something as small as putting some cards on my wall. I do dream of a day when I have complete control over my room. Where I don't have to cram my things into a box room. Until the day comes where I can pick where I live without having to think about the cost of rent, I have to take solace in the small things I can control in my life. The food I buy. The people I let into my life. The art I put in my wall. These are all I have at the moment.